Moving in

-To move in, to take over, to fill with ones own stuff, to clean roof to floor and still not be totally pleased. Oh I think it will be all right though I fear some of the mold will get to me. If the place doesn't work out I only have it for six months, And the way my life has gone as of late that will feel like tomorrow. I don't plan on letting this time go by slowly. I plan to busy myself with friends and work. Or I will go through the same as last time. I don't want that so I will not have it. The woman living upstairs has two? boys and this, oddly enough, is to me a good thing. I believe with these young ones up there I will need not worry about punk band practice at three in the morning. I am in a house so if there are noises and there not mine then they belong to the folks upstairs, no more wondering if it is a above below to the right or the left. Just me or them.

Tomorrow evening I will be going with a group from church to see the Matrix Revolution. I have heard it is not so hot but I still want to find out for myself. Also I will be starting on the road to non loneliness, which if you know me is a problem that I must fight. It is my war and I will fight with all my might. I feel I will fight this one for the rest of my life but I now have a better idea how to do so.

Now a whole new topic. Thought is one I think of often. Now if any of you do not like to hear a woman complain about single life STOP reading now.

I am single and want a man. Now here are the places women can look for men.

1: your local or nonlocal bar
2: your nearby church
3: The community grocery store
4: or really anywhere

If these are the truth, what is it that I am doing wrong. No I have not gone to the bar to look for a male. I have been once or twice and frankly any of those pigs I can pass on. Yes If you are a male and go to the bars and ogle the women then I call you that. I am sorry if you are not but most are. Men don't ogle me and that is all right. Truth is it is good. Oh, at times I wonder if I am attractive but if that is all one gets for being attractive then I don't want it anyhow. (The girl next to me is wearing slip on nike shoes, open toed, bare foot. Yes there is a Chinook today but there is still a lot of snow.)(I dislike the Chinook, yes it is warm but the problem lies in the fact that the body never gets used to the temperature.) Back to my crys of who knows what. I am turning twenty four this year, which suprisingly enough I do not mind. Most often I hate my b-day. Not this year. I will have fun I will be older and more mature. This is all good. The only thing is I am still single and always have been. Will this end for me? I do not know. Now I enjoy it for it's grossness. So many girls, now married, have told me how when they quit looking for it, it came, marriage. I have tried this. Sometimes in hopes that it would bring something about other times just cause I quit. Thing is I go back to wanting it. So, I have decided to give up the giving up. I will keep hoping for it, I will wait for it. But the thing that will be new about me is I will do it with a smile.